TripJ- #2 Picture Day
Hey I Am Jamy Jo Junior and This Is My Story About Picture Day.
So my parents, yeah my parents. So they didn't give me a last name. My name is Jamy Jo Junior. Just Jammy Jo first and middle with no last name. I am Junior to my great, great, great grand father.
Anyways it was picture day and the fucking teachers didn't know how to put me in line so I was always last to get my fucking picture taken. Which sucked so much ass.
So I ate lunch and got fucking mustard stains and ketchup stains on my shirt and I still took the picture anyway. So my moms picks me up.....
She's like OH MY GOD please tell me you didn't take a picture a fucking class picture photo that we give to your fucking Grandma for goodness sakes son you are the dumbest fucking rock that came out of my snatch yet!
I was like shell shocked soon as I slammed that door shut she laid into me about my shirt and how I had fucking stains on them but it was cool that the fucking car smelled like boos and weed.
Shes fucking screaming at me and quoting all kinds of shit from the bible and in between yelling at me she takes a pause and shes like JESUS please tell me JESUS how do I talk to my fucking son that's a fucking moron.
So we get home and of course I jet right in the house. My moms quickly grabs my DAD and is like come here CHUCK now! I knew I was like going get like 40 lashings and had to say like ten hail marries because I had fucking mustard on my fucking t-shirt and it was picture day.
My DAD quickly yells my name as I come racing down the stairs with a new t-shirt on. I drop to my knees and I plead for mercy right off the bat and my DAD looks at me weird and says son, "Did you fucking upset mom again by being a dumbass."
I knew then all bets were off and I was in some deep shit, I think you would of thought I told on Jesus and betrayed him the way I had fucking Mustard on my fucking t-shirt, big deal! My parents were flipping out!
So it was an awkward silence dinner as we are eating and my Moms out of nowhere just screams, "That's it!" Grabs the fucking holy water from one of the cabinets and just starts dabbing up her hand and then flicking the water at me screaming, "DEVIL BE GONE, DEVIL BE GONE FROM MY SON!" My DAD is just fucking staring at this shit while my fucking moms is going crazy so the wise ass I was I said will this clean up my mustard stain and shit?
That was when I knew I was going to hell. My moms was like silent for a whole minute. How do I know? I FUCKING COUNTED that shit man like while I was frozen to my seat as my DAD just stood there like a fucking deer in a headlight frozen to his chair too. I just booked it to my room like fucking road runner I was like beep beep I am the fuck out of there yo my moms had that fucking fiery look to her eyes and shit and I thought she was going like conjurer up a lightning bolt from Heaven and shit and strike me down.
Lets just say I will not eat fucking Lunch again if that's what I did to ruin picture day.